This week, you might notice that February has 29 days—and it’s not a typo. Indeed: 2024 is a leap year, so we get an extra day tacked on to February. Why? From a scientific standpoint, Earth takes 365.25 days to go around the sun…and we can’t let that extra .25 go to waste because every bit counts!
Enter Caesar – as in the OG Roman Emperor, Julius Caesar. After he crossed the Rubicon, whipped his dick out, and went about solidifying his plans for world domination (we’re obviously taking some narrative liberty here with the history bits), Julius Caesar implemented the Julian calendar—and what a coincidence that it is named for him... Inspired by the older Egyptian solar calendar, the Julian Calendar took effect on January 1st, 45 B.C.E.; depending on your perspective, B.C.E. stands for ‘Before Common Era’ or ‘Big Caesar Erection’—we think it works either way.
Anyway, if you are reading this in 2024, you might be wondering what does Roman Emperor big dick energy have to do with me right now? Or, how can I bolster my personal big dick energy and rule the world in my own way? Both are good questions.
We suggest you start by looking at your own calendar and making a plan—it’s always good to be a man with a plan, right? Right. So, even if the 29th of February is presently booked, pick the next available date and declare your own damn “Leap Day” to do whatever the eff you want that isn’t illegal, dangerous, or stupid--you don’t wanna end up going “et tu” like Caesar did, after all…
Why not carve out some time to chill with your favorite Fleshlight Girl content—or plan a rendezvous with your favorite real-life babe in the flesh (preferably with both of you naked). Or, give your favorite fellow ‘Centurions’ a call and enjoy some quality shenanigans with the guys who always have your back. (Lucius Vorenus and Titus Pullo = friendship goals).
Whatever you’re up for and whatever you do, we hope you don’t wait another 4 years to have some extra fun and find ways to feel good…and we really mean that last part in the literal sense around here. *ahem*
Speaking of which, going along with the theme of the year “lasting longer” you might be wondering if there’s at least a witty connection to be made between a year that lasts longer and YOU lasting longer…and indeed, there is!
First off, let us be clear: when it comes (ha!) to how long “normal” is, the jury is deadlocked because from arousal to ejaculation, you are looking at a pretty wide range of time. Your health, age, genetics, environment—it all plays a role in our sex lives. Some scientists suggest the average guy lasts between 5-7 minutes; others put the duration longer. It’s also totally fine and normal too if you can’t exactly put a timestamp on when sex starts and when it ends due to foreplay, stretching and hydration breaks, intermittent cuddling, etc. It’s also normal to ‘cycle’ through your arousal “highs and lows” as you are present with your partner.
Put another way, just ride the wave—and if you blow your load in under 10, cool. If you blow another load later on, even better. If you have any physical or emotional concerns that you feel are impacting your arousal, it’s always a good idea to reach out to a licensed physician or sex therapist.
Meanwhile, if you are serious about honing your sexual stamina and training your dick for some serious imperial conquest, we humbly recommend the Fleshlight Stamina Training Unit™. We weren’t exactly intending to do some shameless self-promotion with this post, but longer year, lasting longer in bed…it not only makes sense, but it’s also too good not bring up!
Contrary to many a crazy internet myth, masturbating does not ruin your ability to last—in fact, it’s quite the opposite! Regular masturbation can improve the duration of your arousal and sometimes even the intensity of your orgasms—whether you party solo or with a partner. Plus, people who regularly masturbate generally “know themselves” enough to be able to convey what they like in bed to their partner—and in turn, they understand their partner has needs too. Indeed: regular masturbation might even help you to exude some of that “Caesar-like” confidence—which is always sexy...(unless you’re from Gaul in the year 51 B.C.E).
The Stamina Training Unit™ is designed to replicate the intense sensations of intercourse to help you train like the sexual gladiator you are. As Julius Caesar himself once said, “Experience is the teacher of all things” and we all know “practice makes perfect”—or in this case, practice feels pretty damn amazing.
Now go forth, Grasshopper and get off…And may all your plans for conquest this year (in bed and beyond) take a huge “leap” forward.